One of the most frequent expressions you hear when a new mom begins breastfeeding is, “Why is breastfeeding so hard? This is not how it’s supposed to be!”
Advertisements and new baby websites show moms with big smiles and happy babies. Isn’t that how it’s supposed to be?
Reality check - Breastfeeding is hard!
We’ll delve into the challenges of feeding your child breast milk. You may confront obstacles on the road to giving your baby the best nutrition. We will discuss these trying times and give you some ways to overcome them!
Before the Hard Work Starts!
All through a woman’s pregnancy, they’ve been gearing themselves up for feeding their baby at their breast right after delivery. In the few weeks before their due date, they ordered their breast pump and all of the other equipment for their breastfeeding journey.
Both mom and dad read all the books and watched all the videos they could find. Then, the mom goes into labor, they go to the hospital, the delivery is over, and the nurse brings the baby to the mother to bond and start breastfeeding.
Uh-oh! This wasn’t in the commercial!
All moms have good intentions to breastfeed, but when it’s time to start, no information in a brochure will teach them exactly how it feels. Before delivery, they’ve been concentrating on the benefits of breast milk for their baby and have never really imagined themselves having a hard time doing the steps involved in breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding is free, right? You don’t have to buy formula, mix it, or clean bottles and all the other gear. But “free” only covers those things. There is a lot of effort that goes into breastfeeding that you realize only when it’s actually time to nurse your baby. The first week is very trying, and most women need extra support. Have a plan and a breastfeeding support system in place to help you through these early days with your baby.
Reasons Why Breastfeeding is So Difficult
Here are some of the difficulties new mothers and newborns face related to the physical aspects of breastfeeding. Don’t be worried! We’ll give you some tips later in this article to ease some of these challenges.
Your baby can’t get a proper latch
Properly latching on is crucial to producing breast milk. The technique is not easy, and getting your infant into the position needed requires practice and patience. Learning this is the most important thing you can do to dispel many of the other breastfeeding challenges. Poor latching leads to pain and discomfort in a breastfeeding mom. Cracked and sore nipples, bruising, and delayed transitions from colostrum to mature milk are some of the outcomes that may happen when your baby cannot latch.
Breast engorgement
Nearly two-thirds of new mothers experience breast engorgement within the first few days after birth. Your baby’s stomach is only the size of a marble when it is born, so the mom may have an overabundance of breast milk left in her breasts once the baby is full. This causes them to become hard and tender, sometimes feeling like boulders in your nursing bra!
Leaking breasts
Along with the engorgement, breastfeeding moms can have leaking or letdown of breast milk. This is not painful but can cause some embarrassment if you are out and your breasts start to leak. Just hearing a baby cry (not necessarily just your own child) can stimulate your breasts to leak!
Breast Infections
A clogged milk duct can cause milk to back up and usually form a lump where the blockage is. It can become red and tender. If not appropriately treated and unclogged, a blocked milk duct can lead to mastitis, an infection of the breast tissue due to bacteria from your baby’s mouth. This is very painful for the mother and may cause fever. If left untreated, you can also risk getting a systemic infection.
Low milk supply
Some common causes of mothers not having enough milk are:
- Delayed initiation of breastfeeding after birth
- Complications with the delivery or illness cause you to be separated from your baby
- Not feeding your infant frequently enough
- Exhaustion and lack of sleep
- Lack of confidence
- Missing your baby’s hunger cues
Thrush
Thrush is a common yeast infection that can be transferred from mother to baby and vice versa. Yeast grows in warm, moist areas; the baby’s mouth is one of those places. The baby may have a diaper rash and a white coating or patches on their tongue. They can give the mom this infection, and her nipples can get uncomfortable with a deep-pink color.
Tongue tie
The strip of skin called the frenulum is under the tongue and anchors it to the mouth's floor. Some babies have a shorter frenulum, which makes it difficult for them to latch on to their mother's breasts. Tongue tie is not uncommon, and some children need no treatment, just a different position.
Lip tie
The upper lip has a strip of skin that goes to the gums above the area where the upper front teeth come in. If it is too short, it can also cause problems with latching on.
Cleft lip and cleft palate
A cleft lip is an opening in the upper lip that can sometimes expose the nasal passages. A cleft palate is when an opening in the roof of the mouth does not close before your baby is born. Sometimes, both exist together. These conditions can cause babies to be unable to suckle at the breast because they cannot get any suction.
Torticollis
Torticollis is a condition causing limited head movement and can hinder breastfeeding significantly. Babies struggle to turn their heads to latch onto the breast. It can cause discomfort for the baby and cause difficulty latching and insufficient sucking. A lactation consultant can help you find the best hold to accommodate their head positioning.
The Author’s StoryAs a young girl, the first time I saw a cousin of mine breastfeed in front of my family, I was shocked. I had never thought about breasts as something with which to feed a baby. My mom and my other family members always had bottle-fed formula to their babies. Breastfeeding was not done in the company of others. As children, we were hushed and ushered out of the room before anyone made a comment when the breastfeeding began. Breastfeeding was not the “normal” practice where I grew up, but when I went to nursing school and learned more about its benefits, I decided to consider it for my babies. Well, when the time came, and because it was not usual for mothers to breastfeed in my family, I didn’t want to. One of my fellow nursing students, Barbara, became a lactation consultant, and when I had my oldest son, she brought the baby to me to feed - with no formula or bottle. I voiced my hesitation, and she insisted that she coach me through the process. My son did not want to latch on. I was scared to death and even more against trying to breastfeed. She left the room and returned with a large syringe with a tube attached. The syringe had a couple of milliliters of formula in it. She taped this to my shoulder and placed the end of the tube right at my nipple. She then positioned my son in what they call a football hold under my arm and moved his head to my breast. He started rooting around with his mouth and finally tasted the formula. He put his mouth over my breast, and she removed the tubing after a few moments. He was latched on enough to get his fill. I was exhausted, but Barbara had done all the work! I gave my best throughout my hospital stay, and it did get somewhat easier to get him to eat. We brought him home, and the next day, Barbara showed up at my door to check on me and the baby. He seemed a bit jaundiced, so she encouraged me to feed him more frequently. This practice helped me feel more at ease holding and feeding my son, and other than sunlight, he needed no further treatment for his jaundice. I still had a lot of anxiety about breastfeeding, but after a few weeks, I felt like I was doing something important that I hadn’t counted on when I was pregnant. After about the first week, I had a good milk supply, and he was thriving. Yes, I had the experience of cracked nipples, soreness from longer nursing sessions, and leaking of my breasts, just as we discussed earlier in this article. I breastfed my first baby for approximately four months. Then I went back to work. I couldn’t work out the pumping schedule and lost my milk supply, so we fed him formula until he ate food and drank whole milk. My second pregnancy was another story. He latched on right away! He had been separated from me and my husband because of his initial testing, and he was so hungry when he was finally brought to the room. He latched on readily, and I had transitional milk by the next day! I still had challenges with breastfeeding, but I felt much more comfortable with the situation and continued breastfeeding until he was nine months old. Again, going back to work contributed to no longer breastfeeding. My experiences with my sons were in the 1990s, and breastfeeding is now more culturally favored than it was at that time, at least in my environment. My granddaughters were breastfed for an entire year, and my daughter-in-law gave the girls breast milk after that time, which she had frozen for colds and fevers and for milk baths if they had irritated skin. I hope my story shows that everyone experiences many thoughts and feelings on their breastfeeding journey. |
Unexpected Situations That Also Make Breastfeeding Difficult
Besides these physical conditions we’ve discussed, you and your baby face many other issues. Breastfeeding is something mothers worldwide do to nourish their babies, but many of them run into the same challenges wherever they are.
Older moms
Many women now have children when they are older than in the past. Sometimes, their pregnancies are more complicated because of their age. Some have underlying medical conditions that they did not when they were younger, and pregnancies are monitored more closely for these moms.
Older moms' labor and delivery processes may not be as clear-cut as younger moms. C-sections, episiotomy tears, and medications given during the procedure may not be tolerated as well.
Environment
Most hospitals are “baby-friendly.” They have private rooms for mom and dad and are sometimes the site for labor, delivery, and postpartum. The baby stays in the same room with its parent or parents, and instead of a nursery where the nurses take care of the babies, mom and dad learn everything about their new baby right there. It’s easier for moms to bond and get feeding cues from the baby all day and night this way. They establish a routine before they are discharged.
Other hospitals have not been fortunate enough to have these accommodations yet, and mom’s experience in the hospital may not be as smooth as others. Whatever the circumstance, the doctors and nurses should be there to help you along the way.
Lack of Support
Not having the support needed during pregnancy, labor, delivery, and postpartum can make it very challenging to breastfeed your infant while carrying out all of the other new parent duties. Breastfeeding is a learned skill, and when a mom has no one to do the other things associated with caring for a new baby, she may be more at risk of stopping breastfeeding altogether.
Mental Health and Mindset
Postpartum depression and stress can strain relationships and make an impact on the entire family while the mother goes through it. The release of oxytocin during breastfeeding should cause this anti-stress hormone to help, but sometimes, it does just the opposite. Make sure to take care of yourself as well as your baby.
Tips to Overcome Breastfeeding Challenges
Let’s look at some tips to alleviate or decrease the chances of these challenges.
Latching on - try different positions. Get the advice of a lactation consultant for help with this.
Breast engorgement -You can ease the fullness by nursing more often, using a warm compress to soothe your breasts before feeding, massaging them while the baby eats, and wearing a good support nursing bra for comfort.
Cracked or sore nipples - use nipple cream. You can also massage the nipples and areolas with a small amount of breast milk to soothe them.
Leaking—Nursing pads, either disposable or reusable, can help with this, but make sure you have extras!
Clogged milk ducts - warm compresses before nursing, massaging the lump during nursing, cold compresses after.
Mastitis—The doctor usually orders antibiotics to treat this condition. You should
continue to breastfeed your infant unless the doctor says not to.
Thrush - The doctor usually orders an antifungal for you, and the pediatrician may also order one for the baby.
Tongue or lip tie - may need surgical intervention if it is hindering breastfeeding.
Torticollis - your baby may need physical therapy and exercises to help stretch their neck and loosen muscles to have more movement in their head.
Low milk supply—A high-efficiency pump may be needed to get enough milk. The Momcozy Mobile Flow™ Hands-Free Pump | M9 is just that! It has a mobile phone app that lets you control the pump settings, track milk volume, and set up personal alerts and notifications of your pumping schedule and other important reminders.
Eating a nutritious diet, taking prenatal vitamins (your doctor may ask that you continue to take these while you breastfeed), and staying hydrated by drinking lots of water are things you can do to feel your best during these challenging times. These can help you increase your milk supply, along with pumping or breastfeeding more frequently.
Support—your loved ones, your doctor, a lactation consultant, or even a support group makes all the difference. Remember, you can let others do household chores and other responsibilities to relieve pressure so you can concentrate on bonding with your baby and learning to increase your breastfeeding skills. Share any concerns with your healthcare providers. They know what to recommend for most issues. Seek the advice of those who’ve been in your position and learn from their experiences.
Conclusion
No one can anticipate how breastfeeding your new baby will go. The best way to meet the challenges head-on is to be aware that they may occur. Your mindset is half the battle and preparation for what is to come is essential. But remember, even when you are prepared, you will still be tired, may have some anxiety, and there may be times when you want to give up.
In these times, concentrate on all of the positive things about breastfeeding. You’ve chosen to give your baby the best nutrition available. Relax and soak up the warm feelings and the love you feel for your baby. Permit yourself to allow others to help with everyday things while you bond with your little one. Infancy goes so fast. Although initially challenging, you will look back and be proud that you provided your baby with the best foundation for a healthy life!
